Night time grief

My Dad passed away in December 2017. I coped , I didn’t cry or get upset just dealt with what needed dealing with. As time has gone on I have continued to support my mum the best I can but more and more I am trying to hide from the fact my dad has gone. I find it hard to talk about him or look at photos but then feel guilty as if I’m trying to forget him. Daytimes are ok , I stay busy but when I come to bed at night it hurts. I find it so hard to get to sleep and when I do I just dream about other relatives that have died but never my dad. As time goes on things are getting harder. I need to talk but I don’t want to talk because then I have to face the truth. I just don’t know how to deal with my pain I was so close to my dad and he meant the world to me.

Hi im so sorry to hear about your loss it's utterly devastating my loss is very different to yours but I feel your pain it gets harder for me as the days seconds go on guilt is natural too please reach out there's lovely people on here who have stopped me from joining my soulmate I've been told the counselling services are good on here too there is cruse bereavement always Samaritans 24/7 im sure kind people in your situation will advise you better on here im sorry for your loss in my thoughts and prayers take care of yourself as much as possible Adele x