Any suggestions on how to get through the first anniversary


It's coming up to the first year of loosing my amazing husband. I'm dreading the actual day, I just can't imagine how me and my kids are going to get through the day. Has anyone got any suggestions as to how we can cope, we are all falling apart, more and more as the day approaches. I am struggling as to how to help my children to cope, although they are in their 20's they seem like babies at the moment. I try and say the right things to them, but I don't always know if I'm saying the right things.
Can anyone help.
Thank you all - Lesley x

Hi im so sorry for your loss it's utterly devastating im heartbreakon it's been six months and three weeks tomorrow afternoon since my soulmate fell asleep in my arms im utterly truamatised witnesing it all happen in front of my eyes all my dreams of growing old together everything my life has been stolen im empty and lost my soulmate has been stolen from me so cruelly and tragically every day is getting worse im sorry im not there yet nor have any children but im sure there are some amazing people who have more advice for you in my thoughts take care as much as possible Adele x

In reply to Ade

Thank you Adele
You are so right. We have been robbed of all our dreams, all our plans for the future. It is heartbreaking, I look at my kids and see the pain in there eyes, and there is nothing I can do to make it getter for them. Utterly soul destroying.
Thanks again for you reply.
Here for you if you want a chat xx

Thankyou for your message im truly sorry for your loss its devastating I hope tomorrow is kinder to you and everyone else too take care speak soon in my thoughts Adele xx

In reply to Lesleym

It’s almost a year for me too and I’m also dreading it. This time last year we were on holiday with not a care in the world and 6 weeks later Margaret was gone. I can’t believe how I’ve got here everything is still a terrible struggle.
I hope the anticipation of the day is worse than the actual day itself.
Take care William

Thank William,
I can't believe it's nearly a year, I think we will struggle for a long time to come. And if its true that grief is measured by the amount of love we shared, then it's going to be life long !
Take care xx

In reply to Lesleym

So sorry for your loss, My husband, Alan passed away 12 months ago this coming Sunday, I really don't know how I'm going to cope on the day. He was never I'll, never a day off work sick. Taken into hospital May Bank Holiday Monday 7th May 2018, was told the following Monday he'd be coming home the week after, then on the Thursday afternoon, his consultant told me further tests revealed a malignancy Alan passed away 38 hours later. I am grateful I was able to be with him until the end, I'd been at his bedside over 24 hours from the Friday, the rest of the time i was in hospital I was there 12 hours plus each and every day. Not because I had to but because I wanted to.

I'm going to the crematorium chapel on Sunday morning with our son and daughter, also my dog Ada and our daughter's different Winston , after that was just going to come home and wander around in a daze, but as I write this, I'm getting thoughts of finding a dig friendly pub and having some lunch, I know Alan would approve of that.

I shall feel numb all day, muddling through as best I can, probably reliving every minute detail and chain of events of the day my darling husband left and the life I'd always known for 50 years (he passed away 6 weeks after our golden wedding anniversary and his funeral was exactly 2 months to the date).

Blessings for strength to help you through the furst anniversary of losing your husband, his we shall get through it I cannot say, but we shall and shall do as best we can.


Thanks for your message, it does help know I'm not alone in this. How sad that I want someone else to feel my pain. I don't really mean it like that though. I'm just dreading the actual day, I'm afraid I won't be able to support my kids as I know I will fall apart myself.
Thank you xx

Just wanted to tell you that you will get through this special day so please don't doubt yourselves. There will be tears of course but try to focus on how far you have come and how proud your loved one would be that you have carried them with you. Some one posted recently that they let a special balloon fly upwards on their anniversaries; I always light a candle...find something that is particularly meaningful for you and try to focus on the love that never dies and remember that you are one year nearer to being together again. God bless x

Thank you so much. One day nearer to being together again is a better way of looking at it. That is what I hope more than ever, that we do eventually come back together!!
Thanks again xx