crap day

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another bad day cant see any point being here and feeling like this i wish it had been me that had been taken and not my loving husband i dont want to do this anymore

Oh, how I feel for you. I have felt the same way many times including earlier today.
It’s completely understandable and normal for someone who has lost so much.
Do you know why today has been so bad? Anything in particular set things off or just the overwhelming feelings that creep up? If you get it off your chest it might help.
Mine was just that non-specific misery!
Here to listen. Wish I could make it better. Xx

hi Belladoo
just seems ti be everything today its my birthday tomorrow and to be honest i just hope i dont wake up family normally come round but ive told everyone not to bother no celebration going to happen here x got picture of my darrell at the side of me and im just begging him to talk to me and come and get me x

In reply to jo xx

My heart goes out to you Jo. You are struggling and I'm not going to say it will get better because you've probably heard that many times already. Hang in there Jo. Keep talking to Darrell. God bless

xx thanx Pattidot xx

Oh dear. Dreadful isn’t it. I’m so sorry. I’m not surprised you’re so bad. I am dreading my birthday,his birthday and our wedding anniversary.
I was told that you shouldn’t isolate yourself away from people but I completely feel like you that you don’t want to see anyone. You just have to let it all out. My grief counsellor, who is brilliant, told me that one of the first stages you encounter is the crying and shouting bit. I’ve found myself that if I really let it out it’s very successful in calming me down afterwards. It’s utterly exhausting trying to keep it in. And knackering after you’ve let it out, but I think you really need to do a lot of crying to start with. I can weep at the drop of a hat but a full blown sobbing session is what I mean. I can always feel when I’m building up to it over a few days. It’s like a pressure release.

I won’t tell you not to hope for no more tomorrow because that’s just the way you feel, and I’ve been there. It’s just the way it is. I hope you can get some sleep tonight and maybe take yourself off for a walk, eat chocolate or do something to be kind to yourself tomorrow. I’ll be thinking of you. X

thank you Belladoo all i do is cry someone said to me the other day Darrell wouldnt want you to be so upset and i juat turned round and said how the bloody hell do you know you didnt know him like i did if i wasnt like this he would of said oh right out of sight out of mind (he always had sonething to say) he would know that i couldnt be without him it might sound really stupid but we were like to peas in a pod we would finish each others sentences we liked the same things we were literaly inseperable we would even know what each other were going to say xx

You and Darrell sound like me and Glen. We were smitten from the first time we properly had a conversation all those years ago. We adored one another and everyone knew it. I loved him to my core, and he me. People who haven’t had an amazing partnership like the ones we both had haven’t got a clue what it’s like. It’s like being ripped in two. They definitely take part of you with them when they go.
It’s nearly five months since my beloved husband died and the pain is beyond measure. I hope you have a better day than you think you will tomorrow. Xx

you were obviously a perfect match xx peopke say better tohave loved and lost that to have never lloved before .... what a load of crap those people have never ever been in love like we were with our husbands as the pain when losing a true loved one is crippling ... take care sending much love xx

In reply to jo xx

Happy Birthday Jo. Every afternoon I have a weepy session, somedays worse than others. It came as usual today and for the first time I asked myself. "what is the point". How long have I got to go on like this. I agree with you, love is crippling when you lose what we have. I sometimes find myself wondering if it was worth it. There's another saying. "What you've never had you never miss.". I know I shouldn't think like this but the pain is so awful.

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